Category Archives: Family

Jul11

How The Kids See Me

Posted on by
How The Kids See Me

Portrait of me by my daughter “yelling about the messy playroom”

This is re-posted from a year ago. It’s one of my favorites.

I think of myself as a pretty laid back mom, and by nature I’m not a yeller, so years back when my oldest daughter returned from art class with a portrait of  me looking like a screaming maniac, I was sure there must have been a mistake.  She took the class with three friends, and there was some confusion over whose portrait was whose.  Three were of serene smiling mothers, and then there was this.  One of the other moms actually was a yeller, so I knowingly looked around the group and told them I though there was a mix up.    My daughter cleared the air by confirming that it was in fact her portrait of me yelling about the messy playroom.  Of course as I slunk away I told her I loved it, and commended her on her originality.  I sincerely meant both compliments, but a part of me caught the first glimpse of how she saw me through her child’s lens, and I had to laugh.  Sure I am a laid back person, and I swear am not a yeller, but many a mom has caught herself losing her cool at her kids about something, and then thinking “who is this raving lunatic the kids are turning me into? This is so not me!”  This portrait just may be my favorite piece of artwork that hangs in our home; it forces me to laugh at myself every time I see it.

I was harder hit a year later when in the same week my daughter brought home a family crest where I was represented by a mop and pail, and my son brought home a cute Mother’s Day card where he finished the sentence “My mother loves to…..” with “wash the dishes“.

 

As disheartening as these depictions of me were I knew that they were completely honest, innocent assessments.  I thought back to how I viewed my own mother as a kid, and from what I remember,  I was only vaguely aware of her as a woman outside of her role as my mom. The first time I recall feeling deep pride and admiration for her accomplishments was when we were writing the text for our wedding invitations, and I realized that as a Ph.D. her proper title was “Dr.” not “Mom”. I guess it took me a while, and still it wasn’t until after I had my own children that I could truly appreciate her in full.   I can’t expect my kids to see me other than through the paradigm of their childish inner world.  Most kids by nature are egocentric creatures.   Most of the time my kids perceptions of me serve as moments of humility, but they can just as easily put me on a pedestal like no one else can.   I have to laugh at the truth in their observations, because no commentary is as candid as a child’s.  This recent portrait of me by my youngest son is a new favorite.  Here he managed to capture the essence of me in the morning with perfection. Certainly this is how I feel before that first cup of coffee.  The funny ones are my favorites, but every now and then a piece of art comes home that just melts my mommy heart into a puddle, and that is the power of kids art.

 

 

(I had to throw in this one where I am listed as 6′ tall and 100 pounds)

May12

The Parenting Book For Global Moms

Posted on by
The Parenting Book For Global Moms

I wish Christine Gross-Loh had written this book about 14 years ago when I was first becoming a mother.  I’m pretty sure it would have been my parenting bible.  There were plenty of  parenting books around back then when I had my first child, but I quickly realized that the philosophies often contradicted each other, and  I would end up following common sense, and ditching the structured advice more often than not anyways. By the time I had my second child I had stopped reading parenting books altogether.  What I like about Christine Gross-Loh’s new book Parenting Without Borders is that it looks at the results, the way kids behave as an outcome of cultural child rearing practices that point to real success in various areas of development.  The author became aware of differing international parenting styles after living in Japan with her small children and then moving back to the U.S.. Suddenly what she would have previously taken as normal parenting, stood out to her as distinctively American parenting, and she realized it wasn’t always the best way to do things. This set off years of international research on parenting styles around the world for her. Eventually it informed her ultimate international patchwork of parenting style with her own kids.

It  makes so much sense, we share best practices in many ways cross-culturally, why not parenting?    Sure, I had done a ton of traveling before having kids myself,  but as a single young woman for most of the time, I can’t say that I was absorbing much parenting advice along the way.  Along with Documama, I write and Edit for World Moms Blog,  a community of bloggers and moms from around the world.  We learn so much, and gain such understanding from each other by sharing our experiences, and advice as technology is making the world a smaller place.

The book illustrates how other cultures can show us how to bring our children up to expect less stuff  like the kids in Japan, be more healthful eaters as in France and Italy, or more independent thinkers like the kids in Sweden. There aspects in which the author believes our American parenting style is superior too.  The point of this book is that we can pull together lessons from around the world for the most balanced possible outcome. Our children, the children of this upcoming generation, will inevitably  be global citizens weather brought up that way or not. We might as well get started!

*I received a free copy of Parenting Without Borders for the purpose of this book review, as always my opinions are honest and my own, and are never swayed by outside influences.

Feb26

Kaboom! Playgrounds And The Power Of Play

Posted on by
Kaboom! Playgrounds And The Power Of Play
 I Must have spent nearly a quarter of the past decade at playgrounds with my kids, so I am thrilled to write about the nonprofit organization,Kaboom! that believes in the power of play.  The neighborhood playground was my office, my social interaction, my snack bar, changing station, and my sanity as a mother.  It was the place we could always go when we needed to get out of the house, and we were there daily.  We could be sure to meet up with other kids and moms wether we planned ahead or not.  For a few hours the kids could climb and shout, and spill their juice boxes all over the ground, which was a few hours less of them doing the same inside our house. As a mother some of my most memorable bonding moments with other mothers took place on the playground, and that’s just what the playground meant to me as a mom!
Playgrounds are really all about the kids and their need to play.  Kids need the freedom to explore and climb, and be physical in a safe place where they can have fun. Growing up my neighborhood playground was such an essential part of my own childhood, I still feel nostalgic when I drive by it. There is the same swing set with the long chains on which I soared and dreamed as a child. The same water fountain is still there where I stood in line on a hot day for a drink, and then got bit by a spider when it was my turn, but tried to act cool because of all of the big kids in line behind me. The climbing castle from which we would jump off the top, and the same fountain where we cooled off in its spray in the summer still stand.   It is hard to imagine where all of that time I spent as a child, and then spent with my own children, would have been spent if we did not have access to the parks we did.

 

Kaboom! is one of the largest nonprofit organizations in the United States dedicated to saving play for children, and was founded by Darell Hammond in 1996 after he had read the story of two children who suffocated while playing in an abandoned car.  They had no where else to play.  Not only do children need safe environments for play,but there is extensive research and data on the power of play, and the difference that unstructured play can make on the health and well-being of a child.
“At KaBOOM! we create opportunities for the collaborative sharing and continued improvement of knowledge and tools that anyone needs to build or improve upon playspaces on their own. As advocates of play, we recognize the importance of each child not only having access to a safe and engaging place to play, but also having the time to play—knowing that it makes children happier, fitter, smarter, creative, and more socially adept”
.- KAboom! Website

 

Watch this video about Kaboom! and how it helps provide play spaces for children:

Through Kaboom! communities in need of playgrounds can build that space or their children, and provide those years of essential activity and free play that all kids need.  If your community or a neighborhood you know of is in need of a playground update of a new playground check out the KAboom! Website to find out how you can make kids dreams come true.  If you are passionate about the power of play you can follow Kaboom! on Facebook, and  if you would like to help support Kaboom! and its mission to provide safe play for all children you can donate here.  

 

I wrote this post as part of The Global Team of 200, a highly specialized group of members of Mom Bloggers for Social Good that concentrates on issues involving women and girls, children, world hunger and maternal health.

Our Motto: Individually we are all powerful. Together we can change the world. We believe in the power of collective action to help others and believe in ourselves to make this world a better place for our children and the world’s children.

Follow along with us here on Tumblr, on Twitter, Pinterest, and Facebook for the latest Global Team of 200 news.

Feb24

Go To Stowe,VT Winter Weekend

Posted on by
Go To Stowe,VT Winter Weekend

Our absolute favorite winter family vacation is a ski trip, and a  Stowe, VT  winter weekend has become a local destination for our family.   It doesn’t hurt that we usually stay with friends at their Topnotch resort and spa townhouse when we go.  Topnotch has an amazing pool area, complete with hot tub, sauna and steam room,  van service to and from the mountain, and plenty of space for both of our families.   The spa is supposed to be wonderful too, but for some (4 kids) reason I haven’t had the opportunity to try it yet, and although my family skis downhill only, our friends rave about the cross-country facilities as well.   We have other friends who always stay at the Stoweflake, which is also supposed to be wonderful and has the added benefit of shopping nearby for those who don’t ski.    As much as we go for the skiing, there are lots of other fun things to do in the Stowe area which makes it  an ideal family getaway.  We love being active with our kids and surrounded by the natural beauty of the outdoors, and Stowe provides plenty of opportunities to do so.  New England temperatures can get quite low, so we are sure to be prepared with the right gear to keep us comfortable, good thermal underwear, balaclavas that go under our ski helmets, and for my husband his Chaval heated ski gloves.  Stowe knows that some skiers may come unprepared and has great shops stock with neccessities stategically placed on the mountain just in case.

 Winter Carnival is held  in the end of January, which was the weekend we happened to be there this year.  Sculptures of ice lined the Spruce Peak Courtyard from the Ice Carving contest , and a bonfire was lit in the outdoor fire-pit for the kids to roast marshmallows, and make s’mores while hot chocolate was served nearby.  We spend a couple of days skiing the mountain, fitting in as many stops as we could at the Waffle Cabin at the top of the gondola for the kids, and the Octagon at the top of the high speed Quad lift for lunch, where you can get deluxe meals like a shredded asian duck wrap (my fave) or seared tuna wrap (my husband’s fave) along with the typical ski fare. While in town we make sure to fit in some time to visit the Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream factory and if you have never been it is worth it to take the tour (yes, you get free samples!).  We love the great food and cozy Italian atmosphere at Trattoria La Festa for a dinner out, and when we have time we head over to the Von Trapp Family lodge to sing and reminisce about one of our favorite family movies, The Sound of Music.  The kids are fascinated with the fact that this is owned by THE Von Trapp family from the movie, and that it is actually a true story.  The Trapp Family Lodge offers tours of the lodge which is lined with family photos, sleigh rides, cross country skiing, or you can visit the bakery, and brewery on the property to taste Austria pastries, and try the Trapp Lager that they brew on site.   The Von Trapp family settled in Stowe because it reminded them of the beautiful Austrian Mountain range of their homeland, and we agree that Stowe, VT is a spectacular setting.   On our way home we play the Sound of Music movie on our car DVD player to keep the kids entertained the whole way back.